Just Friends
by Red Bess Rackham
Summary: Jim finally tells Pam he loves her. When she turns him down, he learns just how a heart breaks. Set during "Casino Night". Twoshot.
1. Breaks

**Disclaimer**: I don't own The Office but I secretly own Jim. So secretly in fact that no one knows except me.

**A/n**: This is my first official foray into the Office fandom, and I would just like to say Jim and Pam are the cutest _ever_. This is technically number three in my unofficial _How A Heart Breaks_ series (all are completely unrelated, just similarly themed) and not based on the song _This is How a Heart Breaks_ by Rob Thomas. This little angsty scene takes place in the beautiful episode, _Casino Night_.

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**Just Friends**

_This is how a heart breaks._

He hadn't really meant to say it. After all, Roy was barely out of the parking lot. He had intended to gently break it to her that he was choosing to transfer to Stanford. He wouldn't – couldn't? – disclose his real reasons for going, though. He was running. Running away from the feelings for Pam that he'd had for so long, away from the reality of Pam and Roy's impending wedding, away from having to see her with someone else until death do they part.

There they were, though, standing outside alone, and he wasn't running. She looked stunning in that blue dress, her eyes sparkling, her face glowing, her hair done _just so_, her smile completely radiant. He gazed at her and it sort of slipped out before he realized he was speaking what he was thinking, before he had the chance to catch himself, to keep his brain attached to his mouth.

The smile dropped from her face.

He knew the damage was done then, and there was absolutely no going back. So he laid it out there. He ignored the part of him that was screaming to stop, to make it a joke, to back out of it and change the subject – to run. He was in love with her, he wanted to be so much more than friends and he had the worst timing in the world. He _loved_ her.

She was completely in shock.

He didn't know what he had been expecting after he let his mouth run wild but the reaction he got was definitely not it. Not from her, not after he had thought so many times that maybe, _just_ maybe, she might felt the same, even just a little bit.

She couldn't reciprocate – she was engaged to Roy, for heaven's sake! How could he expect her to say anything to return his confession? – yet she refused to lose him as a friend, as her best friend. The point, however, was that she did not love him back. They were only, and had to remain, just friends. And yes, he had _the_ worst timing in the world.

He could feel his heart splintering like wood under too much stress. His throat closed, his breath couldn't get through and his chest felt tight, barely containing the cracked and splitting wood. Unwanted tears escaped onto his cheeks before he could stop them – he never wanted to let her, or anyone, see him cry. The tears were evidence of the pain suddenly becoming too much underneath his ribs.

_Yeah, good one Jim._ He thought bitterly. _Way to completely and totally blow absolutely everything. _

"I'm sorry…" she whispered.

He walked away.

_This is how a heart breaks._

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**A/n:** Thanks for reading! Reviews are like oxygen.


	2. Mends

**A/n: **I wasn't going to extend this story, but at the suggestion of my beloved **moony's number 1**, an idea bubbled and formed. So you can thank her for this. :)

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_This is how a heart mends._

He had walked away from her, crushed, devastated and a little embarrassed. He'd been intending to tell her about Stanford – _Stanford!_ – not that he was in love with her. How could he think that was something she wanted to hear? Something she could accept and deal with in an easy manner? She was getting married, _to someone else_, and he was there, confessing undying love.

_Fool._

He had wandered around the side of the building to get a hold of himself, to dry his eyes, pretend like nothing happened. He needed to be ready to move on with his life: a life without Pam, a life where he worked in Stanford, a life where he would end up with someone else while she married Roy. The thought made him choke on the air he breathed, brought the hurt and the tears rushing back, but he worked to force them down. She'd rejected him, that was that. There was no more, there was no happy ending for them.

He decided to go up to the office and gather a few of his things, maybe grab the coat he'd left up there and go home for the night. Suddenly the festivities of Casino Night no longer held any fun for him. Not if he had to see Pam some more, had to face her so soon after she'd shattered his heart. How could he avoid her and then avoid the awkward questions that would inevitably come when people noticed that best friends of the office Pam and Jim were suddenly not speaking to each other? No, it was definitely a much easier thing to just retrieve his coat and go home. So he climbed into the elevator, turned down the hall, and entered the darkened office.

And there _she_ was.

When he saw her, inexplicably standing there as if she was waiting for him, in that stunning blue dress, all thoughts of Stanford and his coat fled completely. He felt raw and vulnerable and maybe that was a dangerous thing to be. Maybe he should have turned around and walked back out of office, gone home like he'd intended, left her to whatever she'd been doing before.

But he couldn't.

_Screw this._ He thought and walked determinedly to her.

"Listen, Jim…" she began softly.

He wasn't going to let her finish. He held her close and kissed her deeply. Any form of logic or control he'd had before now very much long gone as his senses reacted to kissing her, to kissing _Pam_.

Then he felt her hands touch his hair and his neck, and he knew for certain that what she'd said down in the parking lot wasn't true. She didn't want him as a friend, she _did_ have feelings for him. She kissed him back and it was the most wonderful, beautiful thing that he could have possibly imagined.

Sometime later – seconds? Minutes? Hours? – when they slid apart, he breathed, "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that."

She smiled.

_This is how a heart mends._

**-end-**

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**A/n: **I love, love, love the "Casino Night" kiss. But what Jam fan doesn't? ;) And this _for sure_ is the end of this story. Thanks for reading and reviews are like oxygen.


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